Restraining Order

 Duty bound me

To restrain myself

And not cast another

Sly gaze her way,

For if I did, I knew,

I just knew,

--I was a dead man.

The old men, who sat stoically round

The coal stove on wicked winter days,

Would speak of such a phenomenon.

They tried to warn me then,

But being a boy

I only half heard.

“There’ll be jus’ one, little lad

She’ll grab holda’ ya

Before ya ever know it,

And then, Lad, It’ll be too late.

You’ll carry’er for the rest of yer life.”

Another relic, then, would pipe in.

“Ya Boyo, it’ll only happen once

In yer life, so be on yer guard.”

Then, there was silence, save the

Sole sound of hard coal cracking.

Finally, affirmations of “Mmm-hmm”

Were passed around the circle

Like the big jug

From which they would slowly sip all day.

I hated when the Seniors became serious,

So, I would sit to the side, patiently,

Waiting for stories to start again.

They tried to warn me then,

But being a boy

--I only half heard.

Now, voices whisper sympathetically,

Prophets’ predictions from the past

Reaching the reality of this moment in time.

So, I did not look again,

--That day.

As our ships passed in the night,

I convinced myself I was a man,

And a strong-willed man has no fear.

I practiced increments of restraint,

That convinced me that I was in control.

I was a fool to flout the wisdom,

For when warned,

I was but a boy,

And I only half heard.

On a December day,

I cast control to the curb,

And I stared straight into the

Sweet abyss,

And I fell,

--Unrestrained.

When chains come unbound

Freedom is a beautiful thing,

And with wild abandon

We roamed together, freely,

Through that strange terrain,

A momentary kingdom.

But, we only half listened to

Our own warnings, when we

Promised we would practice

Restraint.

When logic prevails,

It can be a good thing,

Or a bad thing,

Or it can be nothing,

If you  maintain restraint.

Such are the choices we make.

“The madness must end

And I am done with you now!”

Words I would rather

Not hear.

Words, I did not hear,

But she still delivered them.

Whatever the reason,

Matters not.

Chop wood; carry water.

Unrestrained, and I knew

I had to heed.

Now, I was a man,

And I could not half hear.

Day turns to night,

Night turns to day,

And I struggled and stray

Through these concrete realms.

Be that as it may,

I cannot defy the courtly command

And I must abide by

The restraining order.